@briangaar: How about a superhero whose power is TAKING CARE OF HIS KIDS *high-fives Maury audience while Batman storms off*
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@PhilJamesson: WHEN CATS ARE SAD Bartender: What'll ya have? Cat: Shot of rum. [Bartender pours it] [Cat slowly pushes it off the bar] Cat: Another.
@max_pad21: Patient: "How much longer do I have doc? Doctor: "Ten." Patient: "Ten what?" Doctor: "Nine..."
@Julie_McGann1: I'm off to a 3yr olds party. There'll be tears, tantrums and throwing up on the carpet. But enough about me, Im sure the kids will have fun.