@Terdoh: How dare you complain about your life? Someone's mom is Snooki.
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@seamussaid: I suppose you can take my cold dead hand when you pry it from my warm live one and charge me w/unlawful possession of human remains
@nedroid: here's my dating advice. Take your date to go-karts. everyone loves go-karts. I just solved your life. you're welcome
@topaz_kell: The good news about falling down the stairs is that my Fitbit counted it as a mile walk.