@NYC_Blonde: How did the butcher introduce his wife? MEET PATTY
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@shariv67: Tonight I'm going to be naughty and tie my man to the bed. Then I'll make him watch a Golden Girls marathon while I eat the left over pizza.
@OfficeofSteve: Whenever the wife asks what I'm eating. I chew faster like a dog and refuse to open my mouth
@Vijaytiwari1611: Knock, Knock. Who's there? Opportunity. Don't be silly - opportunity doesn't knock twice!"