@causticbob: How do American chickens cross the road? In a bucket.
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@TheTimeIGotHigh: "I was so high that I cried because I realized that snakes are just tails with faces"
@PaperWash: before cameras, people would have to say "cheese" for two hours while they got their portrait painted
@midnightwhale: [walks up to firefighters trying to put out a fire] it's alright guys i got this one. *whips out a flamethrower* TIME TO FIGHT FIRE WITH FI-
@RobDenBleyker: Wait, you didn't let me finish. What I was trying to say is Hitler was largely misunderstood by people who don't speak German.