@nowme_datta: How do people get their drivers to murder someone? Mine sulks if I ask him to fetch groceries.
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@Playing_Dad: *consoling friend who is a baker* I'm really sorry about the fire at your bread shop. Looks like your business is toast now.
@SethMacFarlane: Your baby has no idea that you threw him a 1st birthday party. All you did was inconvenience your friends.
@Bownuggets: I put my slacks on just like everyone else, from a waterslide into the loving yet frighteningly powerful arms of my pet minotaur Ferdinand
@ch000ch: date: where did u get that, i don't see that on the menu me: (biting into my corn on the cob) i bring my own corn on the cob