@brennadine: "How hard up for cash do you have to be to wear a chicken suit & wave at cars," I think, adjusting the beak protruding from my forehead
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@theshamingofjay: [interview for doctor's office receptionist] "Can you schedule appointments and be friendly" Yes. "Sorry we're looking for the opposite"
@jennfer46: Husband wanted me to go hunting today. He bought me the cutest brown outfit and a cute lil hat, you know with the fake antl..wait a minute