@CelebrityChez: How long are you supposed to wait before you unpause the tv after your wife tells you she wants a divorce?
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@teacup_giraffe: I walked into the bar sober with $42 & walked out drunk with $42. But you're right fellas, men are smarter than women.
@Gooooats: I live in my parent's basement so I had to dig a deeper basement for my kids to live in. In 20 generations we will reach the Earth's core.
@Momfia: Remember ladies: when a guy says "I'm listening" what he means is "I bet if Godzilla had machine guns for arms he'd of been unstoppable".
@buhsbaby_baby: "MAYBE IT'S THE TRANSMISSION!“ I scream helpfully when I drive past anyone who's car is broken down on the side of the road...