@weinerdog4life: How long do I microwave these turtles before I can teach them karate?
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@ag_loco: Dear Canadians, Who's the cutest little nation? You are! Yes you are! *pinches cheeks*
@pleatedjeans: Kids are so dumb u think Santa's elves made that PS4 yeah right like Sony would ever let that happen learn basic copyright law u lil shits
@freypalm: Astronaut: Dave, that’s not necessary in zero-G. Penguin: [flapping wings] Just let me have this.
@Elizasoul80: When I misplace something and you say "where did you have it last" I feel like you don't know what misplace means.