@BonaFideIntent: How much cocaine is 2 much? Do u think security will view me ridding the elevator from the 1st to 2nd floor for the past 3hrs suspicious??
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@causticbob: My wife said "You only love me because my father left me a million pounds." "That's not true, I'd still love you whoever left it to you"
@bourgeoisalien: No, please continue to talk loudly on the phone, smoke & spit next to my table. No problem! I'm just going to follow you home and kill you.
@liv_thatsme: I'd tell my neighbor about the weird smell coming from her apartment, but she's been so quiet that I don't want to disturb her.
@BuckyIsotope: [on first date] Yes I'll have the- *whispers to waiter* I don't speak French *points at menu* "The French toast, sir?" Yeah. 6 of those.
@Sassafrantz: [first date] Him: You're amazing! I'm having a great time! Me: I will fight you for the rest of this pizza.
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