@omgthatspunny: How much does a hipster weigh? An Instagram!
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@jonnysun: i hate workimg at the lightbulb factory!! evrey day i hav to thimk of good ideas so they can harvest the lightbulbs that apear abov my head
@davidkenny100: American: I was just at a shotgun wedding Me: How far pregnant was the bride? American: You English are insane Shotguns can't get pregnant
@fro_vo: Mission Control: prepare to enter the vacuum of space Dog Astronaut: wait the what now