@omgthatspunny: How much does a hipster weigh? An Instagram!
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@Ms_Moneypenny_: You are right, 27 is "just a number" but I'm looking for a man, not a boy. No offense. PS: Save my number... just in case I change my mind.
@Love_bug1016: The person who is your first and last thought of the day is either the one who has your heart, or who's murder you're secretly plotting.
@LaceyNycole: Guy: Are you pregnant? Me: No, I'm a Ninja Turtle with my shell on BACKWARDS. Guy: ..... Me: Cowabunga, douche!