@GrrrRach: How the hell wizards don't set fire to themselves, I'll never understand; attempting to make potions and stuff, with those dangly sleeves.
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@iLikeCatShirts: Take me down to the paradise city where the grass is green and hey why did you bring all these goats they're eating this luscious grass.
@caperbc75: My dream girl? Dirty blond hair, strong arms, cold eyes, immaculately shaped facial hair, no remorse -Are you describing Chuck Norris? Yes
@david8hughes: Wife [knocking on bathroom door]: hurry up, we're meeting my parents in 10 minutes Me [stepping into bath holding a toaster]: almost ready
@Traceylei2: You know those orange cones they put on the road for you to knock over? Totally just beat my previous high score.