@Rossmac1972: How times have changed.
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@Marlebean: That's disgusting! Where did you learn to do that?! Don't wipe boogers on Mommy's pillow! Wipe it on Daddy's
@JimGaffigan: "Hey you know how everyone's favorite part of the sandwich is the meat, let's add an extra slice of bread?" - Inventor of club sandwich
@eyeswidebutt: did you write "call Gary in HR for lots of really disappointing and hairy sex" on the bathroom stall? [wearing my "I hate gary" tshirt]: no