@SimplyNamedTron: How to dress like Lady Gaga: 1. Go to ikea. 2. Pick a object that doesn't belong on your head. 3. Put it on your head.
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@primawesome: Facebook: Hey remember this pic of your dog that died? Me: Damnit Facebook not now. FB: Sorry... FB: Your ex girlfriend is getting married.
@shkeeber: If you have a family member you that you never want to see again, loan them some money.
@SirEviscerate: There are no atheists in parking lots where you've dropped your phone face down on the asphalt.