@NikiWithIssues: A cool fun way to stop his snoring so you can finally get some sleep is to separate the head from the body.
@isaidwhat_: Can someone make a voodoo doll of me and send it off to the gym?
@BBQJones28: Family cookouts are spent telling me to "stop...don't say that"
@ddsmidt: I told the hubs someone must've broke in and stole his phone charger.
He'll believe that before he'll agree he misplaced it somewhere.
@AthenaMystique: I'd only convert to Christianity to learn how to turn water to wine.
WHADYA MEAN THEY DON'T TEACH YOU THAT? WHAT'S THE POINT, THEN?
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