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@KyleMcDowell86: "Is Phil coming tonight?" "Phil Smith or Phil that has the eyesight of a bird?" *suddenly a man runs face first into the sliding glass door*
@gringothespice: My wife punched me during sex last night. Probably a good idea that my mistress and I do it at her place next time.
@E_lok44: One drink, I feel glamorous Two, I get amorous Three, a bit stammerous Anymore than four, I'm on the floor, all drooly and hammerous
@NicolaJSwinney: Leaflet through the door telling me I can enjoy sex at 75. Which is handy, because I live at number 81.