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@jackiembouvier: Thank you, baby Jesus for helping my favorite sports team instead of saving people from a tsunami. You must really love baseball.
@khook32: If this cat doesn't stop trying to lick my plate, we're having Chinese for dinner tomorrow.
@Slims_Ramblings: Tried to respond angrily with "K" and autocorrect changed it to "I" so now I just sound like a fucking pirate agreeing with what she said.