YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Which cup do you want? 2-year-old: That one! Me: Let's pick a different one. 2-year-old: No! *drinks milk from a shot glass*
@BrucioMcCulloch: I DO love to rush breathlessly into Starbucks and scream "Is anyone in here writing a screen play? We need one! This is an emergency!"
@TheAlexNevil: Death: You'll see me eventually. Me: Or *will* I? D: Uh, yes, you absolutely will. I've got you scheduled. M: Or "do" you? D: Stop that.
@Brampersandon_: Hey check out this new candle I got. -Sweet. What flavor is it? I think you mean 'what scent is it?' *with a mouthful of candle wax* -What?