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@VerifiedBIB: Had great idea for site for recent law grads called BarelyLegal .com. Turns out name was already taken. And their idea was much better.
@dulcetry: This Walmart is advertising $9.99 iPads to anyone who throws their baby into a snakepit.
@adamallday: About to finish my second book of the day! And when I say book, I really mean magazine. And when I say magazine, I really mean pizza.
@XplodingUnicorn: 4-year-old: What happens if I throw up in the red shoe bin by the door? Me: Why is your question alarmingly specific? 4: No reason.