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@GroperCleveland: Apple CEO Tim Cook has come out as gay. This totally explains why the new iPhone charger holes became tighter after Steve Jobs died.
@PaulGibson1963: The first Hobbit movie was half the book. The second, about a quarter. In the sixth instalment, the group has a 3 hour breakfast and a nap.
@MUMSIEesq: *struts past Walmart with Target grocery bags dangling from arms* "You made a big mistake. Huge!"