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@fillthevacuum: Some people around here retweet like it's coming out of their booze allowance.
@tsm560: Reverse psychology is like regular psychology except the woman is facing the other way.
@HallpassCanada: The "Beware of Cat" sign posted outside my house doesn't seem to be having the desired affect.
@thesupergrobi: Stop telling men beards alone will make women love them when everyone knows they need to play the guitar too.
@JimmerThatisAll: This day in history. 1924. Franz Kafka died after a surrealistically charged life which should have its own adjective. Kafkastic? Kafkable?