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@DaddyJew: Judging by this line at Costco it doesn't look like I'll ever see my family again. Sweet.
@Brianhopecomedy: I know I did a good job dressing my 3 year old when my wife doesn't have to tell everyone she sees that I dressed her.
@stuckinaportal: [we both wake up in a panic] her: i dreamed you died me: I DREAMED YOU LEFT ME ALONE AT THE GROCERY CHECKOUT LINE TO GRAB ANOTHER ITEM