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@Book_Krazy: Hubs: * Hands me a broom* Make yourself useful
Me: Flies away
@onion_an: [coming home from cinema]
Don't let that ninja film go to your head again.
*roundhouse kicks the light switch on*
@Lisa_Laughs_: I hate people who take drugs. Like customs officers.
@Schmoodles: I finally decided to unfollow someone who hasn't tweeted in a year. They'll probably come back tomorrow & make me look like a real c**t.
@Bandersnaaatch: Until my sneezes have time to figure out their beliefs, please stop blessing them.
@jumpdashark: My friend called me from a private number last night so I just returned the favor by knocking on his door with a ski mask on.