@weinerdog4life: Huge sale this weekend, we have too many mountain lions, please come buy a mountain lion, this was a horrible business plan, one guy got ate
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@abbycohenwl: Mama Bear: Ok but last time Papa Bear: Thanks, babe [she puts on a Goldilocks wig] Mama Bear (falsetto): I can't sleep here! It's toooo hard
@ShutUpThatsWho: [walking on beach] [find bottle with message in it] Message: IS YOUR FRIDGE RUNNING? [another bottle with message washes against my feet]
@ScottLinnen: Wizard of Oz (1939) A hapless brain injured teen is led down the wrong path to heroin, cosplay, organ harvesting and ultimately homicide
@kwirkyKerri: I'll agree to almost anything if you set a cupcake in front of me. I won't be listening. Because...cupcake.