@lecalabara: Humans are so stupid! This is why aliens probe us. They think our brains are up our butts.
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@thepunningman: "Why do you wanna work at Clickbait Enterprises?" Here's 10 reasons why I should get the job "ok" Number 7 will shock you "You're hired"
@vineyille: "Food expiration dates are lies. It's all about control." My knife breaks as I cut into a plate of milk. "I'm saving this for later."
@TheToddWilliams: [creation] GOD: You all have a divine purpose HORSE: I will plow man's field COW: I will give man milk GUINEA PIG: I will test man's shampoo