@JermHimselfish: Hummingbirds are just regular birds that can't remember the lyrics.
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@RedemptionAJ: Why is there no volume control on the microwave? Must it always wake the entire house when I'm trying to quietly nuke the last of the pizza?
@FullMetalMommy: Chin up divorced people; lots of us smug married parents envy your 50/50 custody agreement.
@theguydf: It's 2014 and somehow we still don't have a car mirror that can make objects appear exactly as far away as they are.
@jeffpfeifer66: Moaning and gasping "Give it to me baby!" during a prostate exam will leave you looking for a new doctor. Anybody know one?