@DothTheDoth: Hungover? Hydrate. Depressed? Hydrate. Want to make a good first impression on others? Hydrate.
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@JermHimselfish: I met Jay-Z in '09 and he said "Meet my fiance, Beyonce" and I was like "That rhymes, you should rap!" and we laughed and he sold me crack.
@BradBroaddus: My rear view mirror broke off. No biggie, I'll just put one of my contact lenses in backwards.
@rorynotroy: the early bird gets the worm but so does the bird that gets outta bed around 1pm because there are plenty of worms out there believe me