@radtoria: I accidentally answered my phone & panicked when I heard someone say "hello?" so I just did the best I could & made the fax machine noise.
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@Momtoteens: Daughter just told me my hair looks good. The request for a ride will be coming in less than 10 minutes.
@joejwest: MARATHON RUNNER: [breaks through ribbon at finish line] GUY WHO LOVES MARATHONS: Hooray GUY WHO LOVES RIBBONS: What the shit
@GrantTanaka: wife: can you check something on my phone for me me: sure what's your passcode w: our anniversary m: w: ANNIVERSARY m: [sweating profusely]