@KalvinMacleod: I accidentally took an extra step when I reached the top of the stairs and now I'm in a marching band.
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@envydatropic: It's cute how my family thinks I'm playing with fire and I'm just trying to cook them breakfast
@Manda_like_wine: Well, son, when a man loves a woman very much he expresses that love by slowly transforming into a human sloth.
@HeyoShellz: My 4 year old refused his dinner but it's ok because I caught him eating a Milkbone earlier