@WritePlay: I always assumed the movie "Grease" got its title from how those characters managed to fit into those pants.
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@LaurenRP: I went outside without makeup on. A child cried and I think a bird flew into a window on purpose.
@Bluestmoon_: *Deletes 34 unheard voicemail messages from phone. *Adds "extremely organized" to resume.
@WakeVII: Parents: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? Parents: Mom and dad. Me: Mom and dad who? Parents: Exactly, you're adopted son. ;'(