@E_lok44: I always carry a megaphone in my purse, in case I wander off and get lost at Costco.
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@blood_orphan: [rap battle] [my opponent attempts to drop the mic, but I stealthily tied it to his finger so it just comes back up like a yo-yo]
@NicestHippo: *walks into son's room to find a recording of him snoring* Dear God *dials 911* Help, a wizard turned my son into a 90's cassette player
@Steelers1972: If zombies ever attack just go to Costco, they have walls, years of food and supplies, and zombies can't get in without a Costco membership