@PimpleEye: I always carry cake, just in case someone pulls a knife on me.
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@GashleyMadison: It's like my nana always said, "If you choose your friends wisely, you'll never have good drugs."
@AbrasiveGhost: What did u do last night? Me: I drowned my swallows in whiskey Don't u mean sorrows? Me [covering tub of dead birds]: is that the saying?