@leontymccarthy: I always hold the door for ladies, but they never seem to get in the car when I do that.
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@LoveNLunchmeat: You could murder someone in California and they wouldn't even arrest you as long as you properly composted the body.
@ThoughtOtter: Me at a wine tasting: *swirls glass* *sniffs* *sips slowly* *stares off into the distance* ...Ah, yes. This is in fact wine.