@OVLH: I always keep a google search for "how to find anyone, anywhere, and kill them" open on my phone in case anyone steals it.
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@SortaBad: Waterskiing is fun. I wish there were more sports where machines just dragged you around
@sheekaxo: Threw some protein bars in the trash & now the raccoons are bench pressing my neighbors Great Dane in the backyard.
@QwertyJones3: MANAGER: Great news guys, I finally got us a gig BAND: Thank God! Finally! MANAGER: *installing RAM* Yeah it'll make this PC way faster
@thenoahkinsey: When you don't even acknowledge I held a door open for you, I want to pull you back inside by your neck, and say "now let's try this again."