@QwertyJones3: I always keep a water spray bottle next to my bed in case a cat burglar breaks in.
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@T_Bonezzz: Been dating this new chick and some days i like her and some days i don't. so i made her a mixed signal tape
@dave_cactus: ME: *seductively removes her G-string* HER: Could you please just hurry up and finish restringing my guitar?
@OurMarketingGuy: Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?