@Dutch_50: I always regret making a good first impression because there is no way I can keep that shit up.
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@Scdavis24: I just found a piece of pizza in my trash can. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN!! WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING!!
@KoKeniSasquatch: Day 8 of quitting smoking: I have 376 gallons of blood to donate. Various types. None is mine.
@bridger_w: This burned out sign has given me the permission I need to take care of my neighborhood grocer once and for all
@ATXBOSS: Everyone suffering from diseases and natural disasters: hang in there, we're liking Facebook posts as fast as we can