@Dutch_50: I always say no to drugs. But, if they ever start deep frying them, I'm in big trouble.
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@imshitimsorry: lady at table behind me: sometimes babies get gassy. they can't burp so they get mad and cry me, turning around angrily: its not JUST babies
@histwaddle: Two cans of Red Bull may give you x-ray vision, but five cans give you the ability to hear oxygen.
@hiitsgabrielle: Unless you fell off the treadmill and smacked your face, no one wants to hear about your workout.
@Ant_F3ltz: Little known fact: If you ride any animal in the zoo for more than 30 seconds... it's yours to keep.