@Dutch_50: I always say no to drugs. But, if they ever start deep frying them, I'm in big trouble.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@CrazyExhaustion: 5yo: What's a cannibal? Me: A person that eats another person. 5yo's eyes widen in horror. Me: You said cannonball, didn't ya?
@danagould: I was having a political fight with someone on Twitter while my dog was out back barking at the wind. Then we switched.
@truegritrumble: WIFE: Can you send these party invites out? ME: Sure *throws them out window* WIFE: Did you- ME: If they're meant to come, they'll come.