@Whitnuts: I always try to tell myself that I don't actually hate people as much as I say I do...and then I go to the mall.
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@murrman5: Sorry I lied about knowing how to play the piano. What's that? Yes, I agree it made the funeral uncomfortable.
@iAmDelFreaky: Mom: Any big plans today? Me: Yes, of course, my friend is coming over and... Mom: The mail doesn't come on Sundays. Me: Oh, then no. :'(
@SamGrittner: The government has officially replaced all measurements of time with fruit. More news at banana.