@jjax44: I always wanted to run a pharmacy and put "Seriously, TMI" on all the receipts.
@Birdhumms: You should never lie through your teeth. Open your mouth and speak properly.
@mellimelle: The older I get, the more I realize nobody is better than I am.
Except people with statues of lions outside their house. They rule.
@TastyTuneTweets: I'm going door-to-door to promote my new gym. It's called "Jehovah's Fitness"
@KateWhineHall: *runs in place*
*takes a deep breath*
*heads toward buffet*
@stephandyer: "It's not you, it's meat" - vegan break up