@954LeenO: I am fluent in three languages...english, sarcasm, and profanity
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@amybethlee70: I read an article today about a cat who saved his owner's life. I'm still trying to teach mine not to vomit hairballs on my bed.
@RunJeffreyRun: I just saw a guy with the Monster energy logo tattooed on his neck, so if your village is missing their idiot, we have him.
@david8hughes: [feeding baby] Wife: here comes the airplane Me whispering in baby's ear as he swallows his food: that was a spoon. Her lies don't end here