@Contwixt: I am rarely judgmental, but I do scowl, and shake my head slowly in disapproval whenever I see a vegan biting its nails.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Wife: Let's go outside. 3-year-old: No! The deer will eat me. Wife: Deer don't eat people 3: The zombie ones do Wife: Get your dad. Now.
@alispagnola: Facebook definitely needs to change their name. Pretty sure books aren't supposed to make you dumber.
@HatfieldAnne: I used to wonder how anybody could possibly drop a cell phone in the toilet. Used to.
@Reverend_Scott: COP: PUT YOUR HANDS UP OCTOPUS: They're tentacles COP: OK PUT ALL 8 TENTACLES UP OCTOPUS: Two are my legs, dude COP: Just go. I give up.