@mkpaulsen: I asked my friend if he wanted a drink and he said to surprise him so I brought back a side salad.
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@candy_badass: Loneliness Status: Eating donuts and talking to the dog. He seems interested, but I think it's the donut.
@DebraMuffin: No thanks, cosmetics lady. I'm years past 'bare & natural'. Save us both some time & show me the stuff you'd need to prep & refinish a wall.
@XplodingUnicorn: My kids challenged me to a cartwheel contest. Long story short, now my chiropractor has a new boat.
@TheTweetOfGod: Warning: the life you are about to lead contains strong language, adult situations and nudity. Exister discretion is advised.