@alispagnola: I asked my friend what keeps her up at night. She answered, "helium." Also, my friend is a balloon.
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@GMPaiella: The part of the Bible I relate to the most is when Jesus makes a scene at the farmers market
@mrjohndarby: [meeting my gf's parents] her: *quietly* don't worry, my dad's nice but he doesn't say much [later] her dad: I love my daughter very a lot me: i see
@lecalabara: I dont know about you guys, but I am amazed Pringles is able to constantly grow the same shaped potato. Science.
@darrinfb: I just found a halloween candy on my lawn and ate it. So I guess I AM able to live off the land if I ever needed to.