@SCbchbum: I assume the #1 reason people change their identity is b/c they answered "You too" when the barista said "Enjoy your bagel."
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@JonnyStallone: If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say "in Jesus name amen"
@TheBoydP: Conspiracy theory: If they really want to catch Big Foot, why don’t they look at the factory where Christmas stockings are made?
@garrydavenport: If my mobile provider started charging 3 times as much as their nearest competitor but there was no voicemail, I'd still stay with them.