@Brianhopecomedy: I babysat for the first time and it was just non-stop screaming. Next time I'll look before I lie down on the couch.
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@daemonic3: "Damn girl, you look hot" Really? "Like a sexy little italian car" DID YOU JUST CALL ME FIAT?!?
@rolldiggity: I just hope people who say "Jesus is my co-pilot" realize he's a 1st century carpenter with no time in a flight simulator.
@ibid78: "We should see other people" PIGEON: coo "It's not u it's me" - coo "I'm breaking up w/ u" - coo "I'm sleeping w/ ur brother" - not coo