@moose_chocolate: I bet a cool thing would be to play musical chairs using toilets and call it "Game of Thrones".
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@yerpalmildsauce: Me: If that baby won't stop crying I'm walking out & going to another restaurant. Gf: You used to do that too. Me: that was months ago.
@LaziestCanine: [stuck on an island] message in bottle: if anyone gets this, please save us bottle returns: if this gets 10k RTs on Twitter we'll send help
@murrman5: [roommate watching me get ready] dont take that with you "why not" why would you "it'll be fine" [hour into date and I spill my bag of ants]
@MUMSIEesq: In my defense, they should have been more specific about which part of the restaurant I was supposed to "Drive Thru"