@IntrepidDeviant: I bet all the cool math nerds call each other algebros.
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@fuzzlime: I like how the dude in the next self-checkout lane is trying to disarm me with small talk like we don't both know this is a goddamn race
@SuperJuanderer: Me: Weaknesses? Oh, I'd say not relating well to other sentient beings. -I meant about the janitor job. Me: Oh ya, I don't know how to sweep
@MelvinofYork: Shrink: How many true friends do you believe you have? Me: Define “true friend.” Shrink: Someone you feel you can tell anything. Me: 11,419.
@joeljeffrey: I hate when people try to make small talk on the elevator. "How's it going?", "How about the weather?", "Where are your pants?".