@arandomhim: I bet the guy who invented the percent symbol, %, got his inspiration from watching his wife put on a seatbelt
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@GinAndJif: Girls, if you're gonna shave your eyebrows off just to draw them on again, at least make them interesting. How about drawing two umbrellas?
@trevso_electric: Now marriage can be between any two people who are misguided enough to start a life together in New Jersey.
@Eightinchgoat: *Pulls your panties to the side* *Tries to remember how I even ended up wearing your panties*
@garrydavenport: "We've been doing this for years, I simply can't be bothered thinking up another long scientific name. Drink?" - people who named the fly.