@TheAlexNevil: I bet there are muppets that have thought about shanking Elmo.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@DaddyJew: Boss:my office, now! Me:*to myself* dont be about Twitter dont be about Twitter B:we've had a sexual harassment complaint M:Oh thank God!
@tvandjam: Wow, you're a Sagittarius?? That must mean you're trusting, passionate and thick as pig shit to think I care about horoscopes
@juliussharpe: Facebook's "People you may know" should be called, "People you definitely know and have been avoiding".
@MrMichaelRose: *seductively boils hot dog* *suggestively unscrews ketchup bottle* *alluringly toasts bun* *erotically describes this in between asterisks*