@TheAlexNevil: I bet there are muppets that have thought about shanking Elmo.
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@JElvisWeinstein: Just because I quit smoking doesn't mean I gave up getting up and randomly leaving the room for 10 minutes.
@GrowlyGrego: *breaks into your house at night* *finds your bedroom* *blows on you til you wake up* HI I'M CHET CAN I INTEREST YOU IN A SECURITY SYSTEM?
@Sean_Burgundy_: Apparently "Which one?" wasn't the best answer when my gf's dad asked me "What are your intentions with my daughter?"