@weinerdog4life: I bet Thor would lose his shit if he knew how many hammers are at Home Depot.
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@actioncookbook: USERS: you're alienating the people who actually use your product TWITTER: likes are now florps USERS: what TWITTER: timeline goes sideways
@rachelle_mandik: HIM: If you're upset that people think you're weird, have you tried being less weird? ME: [eating ice cream with chopsticks] Yes.
@Jade_VK: "This soup was so good I wish I could just...NOMCRNCHNCH" *chewing glass* "There must be a better way!" -Inventing the bread bowl