@VeryGrumpyCat: I bet when Cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one goes "Man, you're such a Cheetah!" and they laugh & eat a zebra or whatever.
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@garrettbarry70: Staying at my daughter's place again this weekend. Can't wait till 3am so I can wake her to tell her there's a moth in my room.
@Pat_Bren: The worst thing about living in the city must be cleaning all the dead parkour people out of your chimney.
@EasilyTempted: If you love a balloon, set it free. If it comes back to you, it probably wasn't a balloon.
@RamblingMachine: If I had a dollar for every time I fell for a tweeter instead of a real person, I could pay for the psychiatric help I obviously need.